There was a very interesting article in The Star yesterday entitled "Good teachers bypassed" written by OLIONG KAM CHONG of Seremban. Needless to say, there is truth in every word that he has written. Tonight I would like to share this article with my readers. Here it goes:
This is the time of the year when teachers are being assessed by their principals and senior assistants on their performance for the year. The assessment will determine their next remuneration adjustment. To some extent, the assessment will also affect the future aspirations and attitudes of these teachers. The good news is that we have competent, committed, reliable and responsible teachers in our schools. The worrying trend is their numbers are fast dwindling. Many have devoted a great number of their good years to the service, but they now feel unappreciated, insecure and disillusioned. This has tempted many to slow down, do the minimum, work to rule, opt out and even throw in the towel.
What is causing this? What needs to be done to arrest the decline and ensure that our schools can continue to have effective and efficient teachers? In our primary and secondary schools, the headmaster or principal and first senior assistant (SA1) are the two chief evaluators of their teachers' annual performances. They hold the key to the promotions, rewards or awards that their teachers can subsequently apply for or attain.
A school head and his SA1 should evaluate their staff objectively, justly and fairly, and award or reward them accordingly. Many heads and their SA1s are doing just that. They should be praised, for they uphold righteousness. But, stories and complaints by teachers are aplenty, more often than not confirming practices of bias, prejudice, favouritism and even cronyism by some school heads and their SA1s. As a result of these unethical and unprofessional acts, well-performing teachers are being bypassed, under-performing teachers are getting the "carrots" while non-performing teachers are getting off easy. And we have a bunch of favoured teachers and cronies scampering around the head and his SA1, ever so willing to pick up whatever "odd jobs" or errands are thrown at them.
Schools are supposed to advocate, teach, model and inculcate good values and practices. If the rot starts from schools with school heads and their SA1s practising bias, prejudice, favouritism and cronyism, one can imagine the cancerous and disastrous effects this can have on all strata of our society and all levels of our organisations, now and in the future. It is sinful for school heads and senior assistants to consciously overlook and suppress the appreciation and approval of genuinely good workers just so their favoured ones and those subservient to their own agenda can get the rewards instead.
Edelweiss56 (google "Severely Bullied Teacher" and you'll know who she is) called me yesterday and told me about the above article. I quickly bought The Star and the first thing I looked for in the newspaper was this article of truth which is written by someone who is probably in the same boat as me. After reading this article, I find that I have something to add to it and that's why I am writing this blog article tonight.
Bias, prejudice, favouritism and cronyism are rampant in the schools nowadays. These cannot be avoided as the principals and their SA1s are "very human" by nature and as we all know, in every organisation, the favoured ones are those who "triumph" in the end. How then can the teachers become the "favoured ones"? The answer is simple - by scampering around the head and his SA1, ever so willing to pick up whatever "odd jobs" or errands thrown at them. This would of course include 1) spying on the less favoured teachers and then make a report to the principal after adding "sauce and spice" and 2) back-stabbing each other to compete for the affection of the principal and her SA1 - what is known as the art of survival. Thus the schools are no longer a pleasant environment to work in. If the principals and teachers were so rotten, how can the schools inculcate good values and practices in our students? That's why I say that the students shouldn't emulate their teachers or principals! They shouldn't follow the bad examples of our educators. What are we celebrating on Teachers' Day? Favouritism? Cronyism? Spyism? Back-stabbingism? Why not have Hawkers' Day or Scavengers' Day instead? I think they are more honourable than many of our teachers. At least they are making an honest living and do not spy on each other or back stab each other.
When the well-performing teachers are being bypassed, and under-performing teachers are getting the "carrots" this would mean that many of our principals, guru cemerlangs, SA1s and college lecturers are of low quality because their positions are not attained by genuine hard work but rather through the art of scampering around the head and his SA1. Once there was a teacher who boasted to me that she is a guru cemerlang. I wasn't proud of her when I heard that. I was wondering if she were one of those fantastic spies and back-stabbers. Out of curiousity I asked those who know her what her character is like. And lo and behold! My surmise was very accurate.
Another funny thing is - those teachers who are awarded scholarships to go for further studies because they have been given very high marks for their Prestasi would go around asking people to write their thesis for them. Even Edelweiss56 has been chosen by our scholarship candidate recently to write her thesis for her! Why? Because Edelweiss56 is a veteran English teacher who speaks good English. It seems that our scholarship candidate here can't afford to write good English and therefore needs to seek the help of Edelweiss56. However, Edelweiss56 is too busy to help. In actual fact, many tuition centres also need her service because they know that she is a good English teacher. And of course there were scholarship candidates who approached me and asked me to write their thesis for them because they know that I like writing! (I don't mind doing it if the pay is good and if I have the time. Right now, I don't have the time.). This clearly explains why we have English lecturers who don't seem to know much and who speak broken English! Maybe the Malaysian Government shouldn't award anymore scholarships. It's a waste of money and very unfair to those teachers without scholarships who can write their own thesis but are being tortured mentally and emotionally by the principals who do not want them to go for further studies. (Google "Oppression in a Secondary School in Kuala Lumpur" to find out what I went through)
What needs to be done to arrest the decline and ensure that our schools can continue to have effective and efficient teachers? It seems that nothing can be done as long as the teachers are forced to sign the blank prestasi forms and then forced to accept whatever marks and comments that the principals and SA1s give them. They won't even get to see the marks and comments. This may sound extremely uncivilized but this is actually what is happening in our Malaysian schools. The secrecy surrounding the giving of marks for the rekod penilaian prestasi is a shameful thing to happen in a country which practises democracy like Malaysia.
Wednesday, December 22, 2010
Thursday, December 16, 2010
REMINISCENCES OF MY LIFE AT SMK B??
The day I got my transfer letter I immediately went to report at my new school. The principal wasn't there nor was the PK1. The clerk asked me whether it was my new posting. She thought I was one of the fresh graduates since she was expecting seven of them. Do I really look that young? Well, I regarded that as a compliment! Many people said that I am very lucky because the new school is only about 5 minutes walk from my house. I do not know whether I can be considered lucky or not cos' from now onwards I would no longer have anymore privacy. Anyway, let's not complain. I should be contented with the present situation. I should be thankful that I escaped from SMK B??. 25 teachers applied for transfer and I am amongst the seven teachers who got it. This is really good luck. I really sympathize with those who wanted to go so eagerly but couldn't get their transfer. I hope that their appeal to the Ministry would produce satisfactory results. Here I would like to thank the Ministry of Education for taking into account my plight and granted me my transfer.
I spent 9 years of my life at SMK B??. Nine years. That's a very long time. It was never my intention to apply for a transfer even though the school is very far away. But this year .... everything has changed.... SMK B?? is no longer the earthly paradise that I used to know. To me, it has become hell.
When I first reported at SMK B?? nine years ago Tuan Haji S was the principal. I didn't realize that I was living in the golden era of my life then. I didn't realize how good Tuan Haji S is until this year. All of a sudden I miss him very much. When he came to my school sometime in February this year, I was so happy to see him that I squeezed his hand so hard telling him that I "rindu" him. I felt that I must give him something. When I opened my drawer, there was a photo frame which was intended for the clerk who got her transfer the previous year but I did not get the chance to give it to her. Luckily I had a present with me that day. I quickly gave it to Tuan Haji S to show him how much I appreciate him.
I also miss Puan Hajah R (my second principal at SMK B??) very much. She was formerly the PK1 of the school. When Tuan Haji S retired she became the new principal. No doubt she has scolded me before but that was still tolerable. I did not keep it in my heart. When I heard news that she would be transferred away I was very sad. That was on the last day of school in the year 2008. I did not want her to go. I hoped that what I heard wasn't true. I shook hands with her sadly at the tarmac that day wishing that she would stay. But she was transferred away in January the following year. Anyway, she told me that she is happy in her present school and I should be happy for her.
I am not a nostalgic person but the present situation that I am in has caused me to think a lot of the past. Why is the past so beautiful? Because the present is so ugly that I have to resort to the past to look for comfort and security. Actually Puan Hajah R is very strict but she has a very kind heart. All of a sudden, I found myself smsing her and calling her just to let her know how much I appreciate her. Before I applied for my transfer I even called Puan Hajah R to ask her if there is the possibility that she would be transferred back to SMK B?? this year. I heard rumours that she may come back. If she comes back then I don't have to leave the school.
Encik N (my third principal at SMK B??) only came here for 10 months. Only 10 months - how short it was! Wherever he goes, there is paradise and he brought along the paradise of SMK B?? with him when he left. From then onwards there is no more paradise for SMK B??.
When I first came to SMK B??, I was so worried that I couldn't cope with the bigger students since I was used to the primary school kids. But I got assimilated into this new environment very fast. The students here are very easy to deal with. They are obedient, well-mannered and lovable. I love them very much and I gladly gave them what I could afford to give. With three good principals and little angels as my students I stayed happily for 8 years at SMK B??. Nothing could make me leave the school although travelling gave me lots of problems. Then came the ninth year ........ a painful year for me. Maybe God is trying to tell me that it's time for me to leave the school. Maybe he has got better plans for me. That was why he sent someone to chase me away.
SMK B?? used to have a very pleasant environment. There was peace and happiness everywhere. I was very happy with everything about the school. My colleagues could be considered okay then compared to other schools where back-stabbing is so rampant. But this year I got a shock when those colleagues whom I thought were nice suddenly become spies and back-stabbers. Can't blame them though. They must learn the art of survival in these changed circumstances. Of course not all of them become spies and back-stabbers. There are still many nice ones around.
My students... they are the ones who will never change. Year in, year out we have the most lovable students but it seems that I do not have the luck to have such good students anymore. Would I ever encounter such good students again in my life? Only heaven knows.
The paradise of SMK B?? - where has it gone? It is no more. Goodbye forever, SMK B??.
I spent 9 years of my life at SMK B??. Nine years. That's a very long time. It was never my intention to apply for a transfer even though the school is very far away. But this year .... everything has changed.... SMK B?? is no longer the earthly paradise that I used to know. To me, it has become hell.
When I first reported at SMK B?? nine years ago Tuan Haji S was the principal. I didn't realize that I was living in the golden era of my life then. I didn't realize how good Tuan Haji S is until this year. All of a sudden I miss him very much. When he came to my school sometime in February this year, I was so happy to see him that I squeezed his hand so hard telling him that I "rindu" him. I felt that I must give him something. When I opened my drawer, there was a photo frame which was intended for the clerk who got her transfer the previous year but I did not get the chance to give it to her. Luckily I had a present with me that day. I quickly gave it to Tuan Haji S to show him how much I appreciate him.
I also miss Puan Hajah R (my second principal at SMK B??) very much. She was formerly the PK1 of the school. When Tuan Haji S retired she became the new principal. No doubt she has scolded me before but that was still tolerable. I did not keep it in my heart. When I heard news that she would be transferred away I was very sad. That was on the last day of school in the year 2008. I did not want her to go. I hoped that what I heard wasn't true. I shook hands with her sadly at the tarmac that day wishing that she would stay. But she was transferred away in January the following year. Anyway, she told me that she is happy in her present school and I should be happy for her.
I am not a nostalgic person but the present situation that I am in has caused me to think a lot of the past. Why is the past so beautiful? Because the present is so ugly that I have to resort to the past to look for comfort and security. Actually Puan Hajah R is very strict but she has a very kind heart. All of a sudden, I found myself smsing her and calling her just to let her know how much I appreciate her. Before I applied for my transfer I even called Puan Hajah R to ask her if there is the possibility that she would be transferred back to SMK B?? this year. I heard rumours that she may come back. If she comes back then I don't have to leave the school.
Encik N (my third principal at SMK B??) only came here for 10 months. Only 10 months - how short it was! Wherever he goes, there is paradise and he brought along the paradise of SMK B?? with him when he left. From then onwards there is no more paradise for SMK B??.
When I first came to SMK B??, I was so worried that I couldn't cope with the bigger students since I was used to the primary school kids. But I got assimilated into this new environment very fast. The students here are very easy to deal with. They are obedient, well-mannered and lovable. I love them very much and I gladly gave them what I could afford to give. With three good principals and little angels as my students I stayed happily for 8 years at SMK B??. Nothing could make me leave the school although travelling gave me lots of problems. Then came the ninth year ........ a painful year for me. Maybe God is trying to tell me that it's time for me to leave the school. Maybe he has got better plans for me. That was why he sent someone to chase me away.
SMK B?? used to have a very pleasant environment. There was peace and happiness everywhere. I was very happy with everything about the school. My colleagues could be considered okay then compared to other schools where back-stabbing is so rampant. But this year I got a shock when those colleagues whom I thought were nice suddenly become spies and back-stabbers. Can't blame them though. They must learn the art of survival in these changed circumstances. Of course not all of them become spies and back-stabbers. There are still many nice ones around.
My students... they are the ones who will never change. Year in, year out we have the most lovable students but it seems that I do not have the luck to have such good students anymore. Would I ever encounter such good students again in my life? Only heaven knows.
The paradise of SMK B?? - where has it gone? It is no more. Goodbye forever, SMK B??.
Friday, November 19, 2010
MY FAREWELL CEREMONY
Today is my last day in SMK B??. The time has finally come for me to leave the school. The moment that I dreaded has finally arrived. This is the situation I expected since the beginning of the year when I was blacklisted by the principal just because I asked her to certify my certs for my PhD application. Because of my foolish mistake in asking her to certify the certs, I have been given a lot of extra work this year. She is probably too afraid that I would have the time to study for the PhD. Apart from sending me for the SPM invigilation during these holidays for the whole month she makes sure that I come back to school after the SPM invigilation for one day to be on duty. Even during the Hari Raya holidays in September she wanted me to come to school to be on duty for one day. Throughout the previous years those teachers who were sent for the SPM invigilation do not have to be on duty during the year end holidays. What's more - as if sending me for the SPM invigilation isn't enough she wanted me to come back to school during the days when I will be invigilating the SPM to settle certain things. In other schools, those teachers who could find a substitute for the SPM invigilation need not have to go. It's a voluntary job anyway. Other principals couldn't be bothered who is going as long as there is someone who is willing to go. But my present principal makes sure that I MUST go and she does not want the substitute teacher (a very nice and kind-hearted colleague who sympathizes with my plight) to go for me.
If the time machine really exists and I could go back to that day, the day I asked her to certify my certs, I would not have asked her. I shouldn't mention the word PhD in front of her. Just study and graduate quietly. That's what I should do. Then I don't have to leave the students that I love so much. Then I can retire in this school. That was what I intended to do all these years - to retire in this school. Our Prime Minister, Dato Seri Najib Tun Razak encourages more Malaysians to pursue their PhDs but does he know how much those who are doing their PhDs suffer? Now, I am paying the price because of my love for education. Since that day, the principal has been trying to look for my faults and weaknesses in everything that I do and if she could ever find any I am sure she would try her best to make life miserable for me. One example is clearly explained in the article "Oppression in a secondary school in Kuala Lumpur" (Just google this article and you will find it). The second one is on its way. That's why I started this blog - to let the whole world know what she is doing to me. And from her expression and behaviour today, I could sense that she is indeed doing something to bring about my downfall. What is her next tactic? I see it clearly now - to provoke me and another party so that we would fight each other. She purposely set fire to something which is so trivial. I am waiting to see what she is going to do and will be writing about this issue if she really does anything to me. Maybe everyone is curious to know who she is. One day, when I really couldn't stand it anymore, I would publish the name of the school in this blog. Now, I still prefer to remain anonymous. If I publish my name in this blog the whole world would know who the principal is. In withholding my name I am in a way also maintaining her anonymity. My photos may not appear too clear after shrinking but those who are close to me would know who I am. I don't dress up like this when I go to school and most of the time I prefer to tie up my hair.
In actual fact, there is no reason why I should leave the school. As what I said in my final speech today, the staffroom is very spacious and comfortable. I love my table. (My colleagues asked me to take the table home) The students in this school are little angels to me and as I said in my final speech today they cannot be found in another school. The school may be very far away but I have stayed on for nine years because of the students. I don't mind the distance. But circumstances just don't allow me to stay there anymore unless I want to invite my own suicide. Nine years - that's a very long time but my principal destroyed what I have built up these nine years. During the farewell ceremony when the students came to me to kiss and hug me one by one, I couldn't hold back my tears. I tried to smile but I started to cry instead. It was indeed a heart-rending ceremony. My students and I ... we were parted just like that - very reluctantly and unwillingly. But what else can I do? This is the best possible choice. The price of the PhD.
This is the most terrible year in my life. As I have said in my previous blog article, I have lost all sensations and feelings for this world - just staring blankly into the future thoughout this year. The saddest thing is I lost my students. I do not know if I can ever find students like them again. So innocent, well-mannered, a bit naughty perhaps but that's normal, very loving, and the girls especially like to manja-manja with me. An idea suddenly came into my mind recently. I wonder if I should take a few years off to do my PhD and then if it's still not too late perhaps I could apply for optional retirement and become a nun. Maybe going after the footsteps of Mother Teresa. Or perhaps I could go elsewhere to another part of the world as a missionary to help with the education of the less fortunate children. I used to be vey proud of my profession but after my prolonged suffering this year I am beginning to wonder if I have made the right choice in becoming a teacher. I do not deny the fact that I am suffering from emotional breakdown now after this year's suffering but I hope that time will heal me.
I do not know if Mr B, the chairman of the teachers' club, reads this blog but if he does I would like to thank him for the beautiful farewell ceremony that he organized for me and another five teachers today.
If the time machine really exists and I could go back to that day, the day I asked her to certify my certs, I would not have asked her. I shouldn't mention the word PhD in front of her. Just study and graduate quietly. That's what I should do. Then I don't have to leave the students that I love so much. Then I can retire in this school. That was what I intended to do all these years - to retire in this school. Our Prime Minister, Dato Seri Najib Tun Razak encourages more Malaysians to pursue their PhDs but does he know how much those who are doing their PhDs suffer? Now, I am paying the price because of my love for education. Since that day, the principal has been trying to look for my faults and weaknesses in everything that I do and if she could ever find any I am sure she would try her best to make life miserable for me. One example is clearly explained in the article "Oppression in a secondary school in Kuala Lumpur" (Just google this article and you will find it). The second one is on its way. That's why I started this blog - to let the whole world know what she is doing to me. And from her expression and behaviour today, I could sense that she is indeed doing something to bring about my downfall. What is her next tactic? I see it clearly now - to provoke me and another party so that we would fight each other. She purposely set fire to something which is so trivial. I am waiting to see what she is going to do and will be writing about this issue if she really does anything to me. Maybe everyone is curious to know who she is. One day, when I really couldn't stand it anymore, I would publish the name of the school in this blog. Now, I still prefer to remain anonymous. If I publish my name in this blog the whole world would know who the principal is. In withholding my name I am in a way also maintaining her anonymity. My photos may not appear too clear after shrinking but those who are close to me would know who I am. I don't dress up like this when I go to school and most of the time I prefer to tie up my hair.
In actual fact, there is no reason why I should leave the school. As what I said in my final speech today, the staffroom is very spacious and comfortable. I love my table. (My colleagues asked me to take the table home) The students in this school are little angels to me and as I said in my final speech today they cannot be found in another school. The school may be very far away but I have stayed on for nine years because of the students. I don't mind the distance. But circumstances just don't allow me to stay there anymore unless I want to invite my own suicide. Nine years - that's a very long time but my principal destroyed what I have built up these nine years. During the farewell ceremony when the students came to me to kiss and hug me one by one, I couldn't hold back my tears. I tried to smile but I started to cry instead. It was indeed a heart-rending ceremony. My students and I ... we were parted just like that - very reluctantly and unwillingly. But what else can I do? This is the best possible choice. The price of the PhD.
This is the most terrible year in my life. As I have said in my previous blog article, I have lost all sensations and feelings for this world - just staring blankly into the future thoughout this year. The saddest thing is I lost my students. I do not know if I can ever find students like them again. So innocent, well-mannered, a bit naughty perhaps but that's normal, very loving, and the girls especially like to manja-manja with me. An idea suddenly came into my mind recently. I wonder if I should take a few years off to do my PhD and then if it's still not too late perhaps I could apply for optional retirement and become a nun. Maybe going after the footsteps of Mother Teresa. Or perhaps I could go elsewhere to another part of the world as a missionary to help with the education of the less fortunate children. I used to be vey proud of my profession but after my prolonged suffering this year I am beginning to wonder if I have made the right choice in becoming a teacher. I do not deny the fact that I am suffering from emotional breakdown now after this year's suffering but I hope that time will heal me.
I do not know if Mr B, the chairman of the teachers' club, reads this blog but if he does I would like to thank him for the beautiful farewell ceremony that he organized for me and another five teachers today.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
THE MOST DREADFUL YEAR IN MY LIFE
This is probbaly the most dreadful year that I have ever experienced in my life. I keep asking myself where is the happy girl whom I once was? Perhaps this happy girl does not exist anymore. In her place is someone who has totally lost all feelings and sensations for this world. I have finally discovered that I live completely without feelings now - just staring blankly into the future. Don't even know what I am doing. When I laugh it isn't really laughing and when I smile I am not really smiling. It is as though I am living from day to day just waiting for the time to pass. Normally, at this time of the year, I would be looking forward to celebrate Christmas and New Year. But even the thought of Christmas and New Year no longer has any significance to me now.
When I was first posted to this school, I was so proud of it that I went around telling everyone about my new posting. But now all I ever want is to go back to a primary school. Anyone here who can tell me what are the chances of me going back to teach in a primary school? Well, this is the only thing I ever want in my life now. Probably the only happiness that I can find. Did I make a mistake for pursuing a degree? Am I ruined by education? The answers seem to be in the affirmative. As what my colleagues said, "Penat, penat belajar kena potong gaji." (I studied so hard but got a pay cut instead.) Did I really get a promotion with my degree? If I were still teaching in a primary school with just my SPM cert my basic pay is higher than what I am getting now. What is the use of a PhD? Even with a PhD I would still be getting less than what a primary school teacher with only SPM qualification would get. Ridiculous, isn't it? Outsiders don't understand. They never will. Only those teachers who are in the same boat with me will understand.
I met a friend, Mr W, when we attended a course early this year. He has been teaching for nearly 20 years in a primary school before he was transferred to a secondary school. (The longer you teach in a primary school before you are transferred to a secondary school the more you have to lose.) He was my former classmate in UPM. He told me that he should have kept his degree quietly. I really pity him. He has been teaching longer than me. He told me that if he were still teaching in the primary school with only his SPM cert his basic pay would be about RM800 higher than what he is getting now. And he lost all his tuition allowance too. In a Chinese primary school every teacher can have a few hundred ringgit extra every month teaching tuition classes in the school. I used to take home about RM400-RM500 every month for the tuition classes alone. It does sound ridiculous that the primary school teachers who studied up to form five are getting a much higher basic pay than their contemporaries who have a master of education. No lies. I am a living example of this unfortunate victim. It seems that even NUTP couldn't do anything about this. I choose not to talk about it anymore- it's all too painful to talk about. I don't like to talk about unpleasant things. Just try to be happy and accept my fate. That's life. That was what I have been doing all these years knowing that the situation cannot be remedied. But what happened to me this year at school keep reminding me that I have made a terrible mistake ie I shouldn't have got that degree. I am filled with remorse now. If only I could have a second chance in life I will definitely NOT take up any degree programs. I only want to stay in a primary school and live happily ever after.
When I was first posted to this school, I was so proud of it that I went around telling everyone about my new posting. But now all I ever want is to go back to a primary school. Anyone here who can tell me what are the chances of me going back to teach in a primary school? Well, this is the only thing I ever want in my life now. Probably the only happiness that I can find. Did I make a mistake for pursuing a degree? Am I ruined by education? The answers seem to be in the affirmative. As what my colleagues said, "Penat, penat belajar kena potong gaji." (I studied so hard but got a pay cut instead.) Did I really get a promotion with my degree? If I were still teaching in a primary school with just my SPM cert my basic pay is higher than what I am getting now. What is the use of a PhD? Even with a PhD I would still be getting less than what a primary school teacher with only SPM qualification would get. Ridiculous, isn't it? Outsiders don't understand. They never will. Only those teachers who are in the same boat with me will understand.
I met a friend, Mr W, when we attended a course early this year. He has been teaching for nearly 20 years in a primary school before he was transferred to a secondary school. (The longer you teach in a primary school before you are transferred to a secondary school the more you have to lose.) He was my former classmate in UPM. He told me that he should have kept his degree quietly. I really pity him. He has been teaching longer than me. He told me that if he were still teaching in the primary school with only his SPM cert his basic pay would be about RM800 higher than what he is getting now. And he lost all his tuition allowance too. In a Chinese primary school every teacher can have a few hundred ringgit extra every month teaching tuition classes in the school. I used to take home about RM400-RM500 every month for the tuition classes alone. It does sound ridiculous that the primary school teachers who studied up to form five are getting a much higher basic pay than their contemporaries who have a master of education. No lies. I am a living example of this unfortunate victim. It seems that even NUTP couldn't do anything about this. I choose not to talk about it anymore- it's all too painful to talk about. I don't like to talk about unpleasant things. Just try to be happy and accept my fate. That's life. That was what I have been doing all these years knowing that the situation cannot be remedied. But what happened to me this year at school keep reminding me that I have made a terrible mistake ie I shouldn't have got that degree. I am filled with remorse now. If only I could have a second chance in life I will definitely NOT take up any degree programs. I only want to stay in a primary school and live happily ever after.
Tuesday, October 26, 2010
I Will Leave the School with a Heavy Heart
I have already submitted my application for a transfer for the second time. Do I really want to leave the school? Would I be happy in the new school? If I have a choice I would choose to stay but if I stay then the trauma continues. If I leave I am not sure if I would like the new school. To be frank, I love the students in my present school very much. Why do I love them so much? They have very good manners and know how to respect the teachers. Yesterday, when I met the 1A girls at the staircase they came to me one by one and kissed my hand. Today, the 1Y girls came to me one by one to kiss my hand. When I entered 1G for invigilation (I don't teach that class) all the students clapped their hands when they saw me. This isn't the only class doing this. Many other classes are also giving me such a warm welcome whenever I enter to relief. Although some of the boys are a bit naughty, they can still be controlled. Just mention Ustaz A or Mr B's name and they will run for their lives.
Edelweiss56 told me that in the present school that she is teaching, there was this girl who asked her for the permission to go to the toilet. When she said "no", this girl scolded her mother with the four letter word in chinese.
Do I have a choice? No, I don't. I have already asked for my students' phone numbers. Maybe I can still arrange to meet them somewhere after I left the school. I am not a race conscious person. Although my students are mostly Malays (with a few students of other races) I am so used to their ways that I care for them very much.
Edelweiss56 told me that in the present school that she is teaching, there was this girl who asked her for the permission to go to the toilet. When she said "no", this girl scolded her mother with the four letter word in chinese.
Do I have a choice? No, I don't. I have already asked for my students' phone numbers. Maybe I can still arrange to meet them somewhere after I left the school. I am not a race conscious person. Although my students are mostly Malays (with a few students of other races) I am so used to their ways that I care for them very much.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
WHEN MALAYSIAN TEACHERS BECOME PROFESSIONAL SPIES
What prompts me to write this article tonight? The truth is if I have a choice I wouldn't have started this blog. I have been wondering what would be the fate of Edelweiss56 (google the article "Severely Bullied Teacher" and you will know who she is) if the principal had not done anything dreadful to me. Edelweiss56 would probably have to suffer in silence again as no one would help her to write her blog and make her plight known to the world. I live in my own world. I don't care much about what is happening around me. It was the principal's bullying tactics that sparked off the courage and determination in me to seek justice for all those teachers who are in the same boat as me. And I am writing this article tonight to make it known to the world what some our teachers have metamorphosized into in order to please the principal and enhance the principal's bullying tactics.
Students should never emulate their teachers. Why am I saying this? Firstly look at the PPSMI. Despite the Malaysian Government's efforts to make our teachers learn English, the majority of them ended up learning nothing. But lo and behold! When it comes to spying and back-stabbing our Malaysian teachers rank the highest in the world. This is not my opinion alone. My friends who are teaching in other schools are telling me the same thing. Competition amongst the teachers are great. What do they compete for? The principal's affection since this would mean they can get high marks for their prestasi or they can even be a guru cemerlang. And to do so they have to back stab each other and become professional spies. My principal never enters the staffroom but she knows exactly what is happening there including how many minutes the teachers were late for class because of the "pot luck". The pot luck was banned forever because of that. Luckily I am never involved with the pot luck. Apart from hotel food, I only eat the food that I cook myself. If anyone wants to give the principal a piece of her mind, it is not necessary to tell the principal face to face. Just say it out loud in the staffroom and the principal will get the message in no time.
What makes our teachers stoop so low and gladly lick the shoes of the principal? Because they want to be guru cemerlang. So you know now what guru cemerlang means. And since the guru cemerlangs are those who would become the future principals this clearly explains why there are so many bullying cases in schools where the biggest bullies of all are none other than the principals themselves. The Rekod Penilaian Prestasi is another culprit. Because the teachers want high marks for their prestasi they would go all the way out to please the principal even if it means betraying their colleagues. Never mind. This is a dog eat dog world - the survival of the fittest. To survive and be the fittest they have to bring down others - this is human nature. Charles Darwin taught them. So this means that if a teacher wants to get high marks for her rekod prestasi she must be a good spy and she must do a lot of back stabbing. She must also know how to despise the teachers whom the principal is not in favour of. If the principal is not in favour of a particular teacher then this professional spy would take the opportunity to do some back stabbing and some spying job on her for the principal even though this particular teacher was once her good friend. What are friends anyway? They don't worth any marks. The markah prestasi is more important. Being a guru cemerlang is more important.
I don't accuse people. I write from experience. There was once a teacher who was a good friend of mine. Since the principal sent me to the gallows for asking her to certify my certs for my PhD application (as I've said earlier there was no supervisor for my field but the damage is done) her attitude towards me changed. She pretended that she didn't see me whenever she walked past me. Edelweiss56 told me that this teacher must the one who complained to the principal that she (Edelweiss56) did not do anything for the debate since both of them were in charge of the debate. I actually saw Edelweiss56 in the library training the students when I went into the library to read newspapers. Puan R (the teacher who lodged a police report against the principal) told me it was the same teacher who betrayed her - telling bad things about her to the principal. That was why the principal interrogated Puan R for three hours in the presence of other witnesses. During the interrogation the principal even called this teacher in front of Puan R to confirm that Puan R has indeed committed a "crime".
This teacher is not the only spy in my school. Of course there are others and it is not difficult to tell from their behaviour that they have been elevated to a higher position i.e. professional spy. They all react in the same way. People who used to be nice and friendly but who are no longer nice and friendly are those who have become spies. You don't even have to ask them. Their behaviour is enough proof. And of course you can see them spying outside the classroom. Looking for evidence to penalize me and then report to the principal I suppose. This is their mission. Why should they be nice and friendly to someone whom the principal is bullying? I consider this a very shameful thing to happen in Malaysia. The school environment should be a harmonious environment where the teachers' most important mission is to educate the children. However, the opposite seems to be true. Since when did our principals become big bullies and our teachers become professional spies? Since when did back stabbing become the norm in our Malaysian schools? Is it because time has changed? What will our society become in the year 2020? Surely we do not want our children to emulate their teachers and grow up to become hypocrites! Perhaps it's time for the ministry to look into what is really going on in the schools instead of just focusing on guru cemerlang, markah prestasi cemerlang and pengetua cemerlang. We do not want our future generation to become hypocrites cemerlang.
Students should never emulate their teachers. Why am I saying this? Firstly look at the PPSMI. Despite the Malaysian Government's efforts to make our teachers learn English, the majority of them ended up learning nothing. But lo and behold! When it comes to spying and back-stabbing our Malaysian teachers rank the highest in the world. This is not my opinion alone. My friends who are teaching in other schools are telling me the same thing. Competition amongst the teachers are great. What do they compete for? The principal's affection since this would mean they can get high marks for their prestasi or they can even be a guru cemerlang. And to do so they have to back stab each other and become professional spies. My principal never enters the staffroom but she knows exactly what is happening there including how many minutes the teachers were late for class because of the "pot luck". The pot luck was banned forever because of that. Luckily I am never involved with the pot luck. Apart from hotel food, I only eat the food that I cook myself. If anyone wants to give the principal a piece of her mind, it is not necessary to tell the principal face to face. Just say it out loud in the staffroom and the principal will get the message in no time.
What makes our teachers stoop so low and gladly lick the shoes of the principal? Because they want to be guru cemerlang. So you know now what guru cemerlang means. And since the guru cemerlangs are those who would become the future principals this clearly explains why there are so many bullying cases in schools where the biggest bullies of all are none other than the principals themselves. The Rekod Penilaian Prestasi is another culprit. Because the teachers want high marks for their prestasi they would go all the way out to please the principal even if it means betraying their colleagues. Never mind. This is a dog eat dog world - the survival of the fittest. To survive and be the fittest they have to bring down others - this is human nature. Charles Darwin taught them. So this means that if a teacher wants to get high marks for her rekod prestasi she must be a good spy and she must do a lot of back stabbing. She must also know how to despise the teachers whom the principal is not in favour of. If the principal is not in favour of a particular teacher then this professional spy would take the opportunity to do some back stabbing and some spying job on her for the principal even though this particular teacher was once her good friend. What are friends anyway? They don't worth any marks. The markah prestasi is more important. Being a guru cemerlang is more important.
I don't accuse people. I write from experience. There was once a teacher who was a good friend of mine. Since the principal sent me to the gallows for asking her to certify my certs for my PhD application (as I've said earlier there was no supervisor for my field but the damage is done) her attitude towards me changed. She pretended that she didn't see me whenever she walked past me. Edelweiss56 told me that this teacher must the one who complained to the principal that she (Edelweiss56) did not do anything for the debate since both of them were in charge of the debate. I actually saw Edelweiss56 in the library training the students when I went into the library to read newspapers. Puan R (the teacher who lodged a police report against the principal) told me it was the same teacher who betrayed her - telling bad things about her to the principal. That was why the principal interrogated Puan R for three hours in the presence of other witnesses. During the interrogation the principal even called this teacher in front of Puan R to confirm that Puan R has indeed committed a "crime".
This teacher is not the only spy in my school. Of course there are others and it is not difficult to tell from their behaviour that they have been elevated to a higher position i.e. professional spy. They all react in the same way. People who used to be nice and friendly but who are no longer nice and friendly are those who have become spies. You don't even have to ask them. Their behaviour is enough proof. And of course you can see them spying outside the classroom. Looking for evidence to penalize me and then report to the principal I suppose. This is their mission. Why should they be nice and friendly to someone whom the principal is bullying? I consider this a very shameful thing to happen in Malaysia. The school environment should be a harmonious environment where the teachers' most important mission is to educate the children. However, the opposite seems to be true. Since when did our principals become big bullies and our teachers become professional spies? Since when did back stabbing become the norm in our Malaysian schools? Is it because time has changed? What will our society become in the year 2020? Surely we do not want our children to emulate their teachers and grow up to become hypocrites! Perhaps it's time for the ministry to look into what is really going on in the schools instead of just focusing on guru cemerlang, markah prestasi cemerlang and pengetua cemerlang. We do not want our future generation to become hypocrites cemerlang.
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
SHOULD I LODGE A POLICE REPORT?
There are news that the present principal may be transferred to another school. Everyone seems to be talking about it with excitement. When I told Edelweiss56 about it, she got a shock. She left the school because of my present principal. Since her principal would be retiring soon, there is the possibility that my present principal (her former principal) may be transferred to her school. Guess what she said? She said that if my present principal really goes to her school she would lodge a police report. The reason why she wanted to lodge a police report is clearly written in her blog article entitled "Severely Bullied Teacher". (Just google this article and you will find it). In fact this article was listed by Google when it first came out.
Something happened in my school on the 13th. of May 2010. That was a few months back. One of our colleagues, Puan R, who was interrogated for 3 hours by my present principal went to lodge a police report immediately after that. When Edelweiss56 saw her crying after the interrogation, (Edelweiss56 was still teaching in my school at that time) she quickly looked for me and told me what happened to Puan R. Puan R then told me that she was being interrogated for three hours by the principal. During these three hours she was not allowed to eat even though she was hungry. This really reminds me of how the criminals are being interrogated by the police. Is Puan R a criminal? The principal also threatened Puan R telling Puan R that she would give her 70 marks only for her prestasi this year. That was why Puan R cried so bitterly. Puan R's husband who is a police came to the school that day and they invited us (Edelweiss56 and I) to go to the police station with them to lodge a police report against the principal. At first we were very eager to go. But later, I changed my mind. I did not want to create trouble since I have already written my blog article about the principal's bullying case and taught Edelweiss56 to write hers. Edelweiss56 then said that we can still make the police report if the principal gives us less than 80 marks in the laporan penilaian prestasi since only the police report can invalidate the marks that are given irrationally.
What the principal did to me was clearly written in my blog article entitled "Oppression in a Secondary School in Kuala Lumpur". (Just google this article and you can find it). Did I do the wrong thing when I declined Puan R's offer to lodge a police report against the principal? Puan R is very safe now since she has a police report. Should the principal give her below 80 marks, the marks will be invalidated by her police report. Edelweiss56 called me yesterday and said that I can still make the police report now. Well, let's see how many marks she will give me first!
Something happened in my school on the 13th. of May 2010. That was a few months back. One of our colleagues, Puan R, who was interrogated for 3 hours by my present principal went to lodge a police report immediately after that. When Edelweiss56 saw her crying after the interrogation, (Edelweiss56 was still teaching in my school at that time) she quickly looked for me and told me what happened to Puan R. Puan R then told me that she was being interrogated for three hours by the principal. During these three hours she was not allowed to eat even though she was hungry. This really reminds me of how the criminals are being interrogated by the police. Is Puan R a criminal? The principal also threatened Puan R telling Puan R that she would give her 70 marks only for her prestasi this year. That was why Puan R cried so bitterly. Puan R's husband who is a police came to the school that day and they invited us (Edelweiss56 and I) to go to the police station with them to lodge a police report against the principal. At first we were very eager to go. But later, I changed my mind. I did not want to create trouble since I have already written my blog article about the principal's bullying case and taught Edelweiss56 to write hers. Edelweiss56 then said that we can still make the police report if the principal gives us less than 80 marks in the laporan penilaian prestasi since only the police report can invalidate the marks that are given irrationally.
What the principal did to me was clearly written in my blog article entitled "Oppression in a Secondary School in Kuala Lumpur". (Just google this article and you can find it). Did I do the wrong thing when I declined Puan R's offer to lodge a police report against the principal? Puan R is very safe now since she has a police report. Should the principal give her below 80 marks, the marks will be invalidated by her police report. Edelweiss56 called me yesterday and said that I can still make the police report now. Well, let's see how many marks she will give me first!
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